My Love for Them

This little one.  She’s mine forever.

Baby, toddler, child, pre-teen, teenager, young adult, wife, mother…she is and always will be my daughter.

And I wish we were always like this picture.  Two peas-in-a-pod.  I could pretend I am mother of the year.  That I am always patient, long-suffering, kind, loving, merciful, gracious.

And I could pretend that she is the daughter of the year… obedient, sweet, happy, generous, cheerful.  Unfortunately I am her sinful mother and she is my sinful daughter.  Sometimes we do well together and sometimes we are barely surviving.  She throws fits, she cries, she pouts, I become short tempered, irritable and un-loving.  During those times I often find myself dialing a familiar number to hear a familiar voice on the other end of the phone.  I pour my heart out to this person, I confess my struggles and I soak in her words of wisdom.  My mother.

She comforts me by assuring me I am normal.  She often draws from memories in her own life…and then she gives me words to live by.

“Start your day reading the bible and praying.  Try your very hardest to not complain…and especially do not verbalize your complaints.  Do not feel sorry for yourself.  Life is disappointing in many ways and when you truly realize this..when you lower your childish expectations,  you will find joy in the Lord. You will find joy in His promises.”

So I breathe deeply.  I thank her for her loving and encouraging words, I hang up the phone and  I remember something…I did not always get along with my mom. More than often I was wrong but sometimes she was too and yet, God has used her more in my life than any other woman.  She has been my constant friend, my most loyal prayer warrior, a firm support, a listening ear…She has and always will be my mother.  From the day I was born, to the day I die.  She has shaped me.

So I look at my precious, precious Cora and my adorably innocent Elinor (Who could believe there is a sin nature in there? :) )  and I realize the job God has given me.  How seriously I need to take my role and position as their mother.  They are mine from now until God separates us through death…and even after death how I treated them, how I loved them, will continue to shape the women they become.

I really hope that one day they will be calling me on the phone.  That they will be looking to me for comfort, for support, for love, for wisdom.  That my mothering won’t end when they leave the house but that it will continue until the end.  That when they think back to their childhood they will have sweet memories…that all of the impatience, the unkindness,the uncharitable things I did and said will be covered over and forgotten by my imperfect but constant love for them.

8 Responses to My Love for Them

  1. i know they will be calling you. you are such a gem. your girl’s will know it soon, too. : )

    i’m glad you have a mother to go to like that!

  2. Beautiful Grace! God has given us a task as mothers and its not an easy one, to have moms that we can turn to when the going gets tough is a blessing. Your Mom’s words to live by, well they are beautiful and so very true, I’m going to copy them into my notebook so I don’t forget them. I pray you and your family have a wonderful Easter weekend!

  3. Danelle says:

    your mom will be grabbing for the tissues when she reads this :) beautiful post, Grace!

  4. Betty says:

    Beautiful post! I must agree, I have very little memory of my mom losing her temper, crying, or being mean. She says we blocked it out, but I like what you said about her constant love being what we remember most.

  5. bchallies says:

    I am so glad to be mom to my children. What higher a calling could there possibly be? One thing, though: I want you to always know that I don’t consider the need for a tired, discouraged heart to express itself complaining. That is just being human….Complaining is gratuitous grumbling.

  6. LeAnna says:

    So beautiful, indeed. It’s neat how our Mom’s {can} become our greatest friends as we leave home and start our own families. I know that’s been the case for me. Oh, how I want that gentle spirit…

  7. Beth says:

    This brought tears to my eyes, so I can only imagine what your mom will do when she reads it. The pictures, as always, are stunning. I am starting to think you should just go into photography. But your words are so heartfelt and genuine. And your mom’s advice – so perfect. So so wise.

  8. I agree! And I am thankful for Mom’s comment about the difference between being heard, and complaining. Interesting to think about!

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